tell her no need for introductions. and that you've read about her on the back of toilet doors.
dude, osama threatened the US again
dude. i slept with your sister last night
what?
I saw that as an opertune moment to drop some big news
windsor, ontario is like a poor man's amsterdam
no, it is just poor
I just saw a man salute the budweiser truck on the highway. I want to follow him and shake his hand.
She just dipped a dollar bill in her queso dip and almost ate it before I slapped it out of her hand, no more bar crawls..
she just announced that once she was paid to deep throat a light saber with a mint flavored condom on it. i'm speechless.
It hurts to peel the glue off my chest and i keep finding glitter in my hair.
I just wanted to decorate you...
he does have a point though, watching you drink makes me never want to drink again
Just saw pictures of a pregnant teen from my hometown with an American flag wrapped around her naked body posted on FB without irony. These are my roots.
Would it be inappropriate to rub one out in the gym shower? I mean, technically, I pay $80 a month to do what I want so could they really say anything?
Shower is fine. Steam room is shady. I've probably done both at one point in my life so I can't be used as a good reference.
Hahahahaha. That's what your stoned ass gets for eating half a bag of processed cheese at 2am.
DON'T PUKE iN THE PRINGLES CAN, WHATEVER YOU DO!
Today's goals: get day drunk then sober up in time for the walking dead tonight.
I think I fell asleep on my pizza last night. Damn, I am sauccccy.
Alcohol and video games. A solid Friday night. Even before covid
Randomize
