There were 3 chicks in my bed I didn't know when I got home. Now I know all of them. Biblically.
He seems like he has feelings, which is completely unacceptable; esp for a boy in college.
I am not a stalker...i just bring a whole new meaning to the word love
After walking in on us in the living room, he still insisted that he slept in my bed with me afterwards.
I mostly enjoyed dancing with him because his boner was scratching my bug bites.
Hurricane Sex Time is the only thing iv said since it started.
P.S. The slutty NASCAR driver costume will be saved and used year round for role play.
Suppose hypothetically u received a request for face time communication with a gentleman who looked astonishingly like a penis. Would you indulge him in conversation? Hypothetically of course.
You gave your boss a bj to get the safe employee of the month award?
I'm not going to pass up the opportunity to be half naked and covered in glitter without facing judgement or legal prosecution. I'll be there.
Just wanted to say a big ole FUCK YOU for coming out to mom the day before I have to drive with her for 6 hours. Ass hat.
This is the fourth day in a row I woke up with cheetos spread around me in a ritual pattern..this weed is unreal
When she saw "buy condoms" on my to do list she figured out pretty quick we were breaking up.
Had a vaginal orgasm. I feel like I made sex my bitch.
All I know is I woke up with my apartment door wide open, naked, and I poured an entire bottle of Advil on my bed to sleep in.
Randomize
