I just applied for an unsubsidized loan naked. I love the internet.
i thought i was the drunkest one there til some girl puked in the tip jar.
I'm stoned and have been watching so many cartoons that I changed the channel and real people were on, and it scared me
You were dancing on the bar and fell off into the arms of the hot bartender. It was like a fairy tale, with more alcohol.
You two were too busy to notice that his used condom landed on me when he threw it.. Thanks.
he came on my stomach, took his sock off, wiped it up, put his sock back on along with his shoes and left.
He has crabs, not bed bugs. I recommend incoporating a clinic on this mornings walk of shame route.
Police were closing down the bar due to gunfight and I was crying because they wouldn't let me finish putting temporary shamrock tats on my boobs
You know how hard it is to drive a dirtbike down a road with 2 plants of weed on your lap. Fucking hard
I'm pretty sure they had a hash wedding cake. I love college weddings.
Clearly my hormones are sending beaming lights to every penis in the area
Pavlovs bj experiment 2012. Welcome to the program.
Nothing is creepier than a guy telling you "I was just thinking about you" in a men's bathroom when taking a shit
I knew the bike rally would be fun when I saw "male pole dancing" on the schedule
Replacing my paralegal is easy. Replacing my favorite office fuck toy is a totally different story. Damn him for wanting to better himself instead of being my manwhore
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