Just did shrooms. Don't feel shit! Wsasted 40 bucks on this! Nothing's happenig except for this little gnome on my shoulder and the couch is melting. Fuckin waste of money.
FOR A FUCKING 40?! A FUCKING 40?! YOU GAVE THE CAT AWAY FOR BEER?!
I walked in on him shirtless licking the mirror while talking to his reflection. So yes, I definitely want to do shrooms the next time you get them.
No stds, not pregs, and lost two pounds. I'd call that a successful two years of grad school.
She saved the condom from the first time we did it.
your mascara is on the toilet seat from when you fell asleep last night
on a brighter note, the strip club found my atm card
i walked outside and you were driving up the stairs to her apartment
No more Raisinettes before sex. That's what happened. I just put it together
Nothing like moscato in your sinuses tobmake your night complete
I think people like me is why alcohol became illegal at one point
I say I hate my boss but I find myself jerking off to him more and more with each passing day
There's a cute bearded guy at this brew fest wearing a kilt and selling mead
TELL HIM ABOUT MY DOWRY!!!
Are you drunk already?
Not already - at LAST.
You don't make any sense
TEQUILA
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