Who has a tranny cab driver? I have a tranny cab driver.
when a 14 year old is judging you, you know you've had too much to drink
i spelled "betch" that way on purpose, don't question my abilities as a drunk texter
well i had to explain to their mom why the kids i babysit for won't stop repeating the phrase "nice juicy guido"
His body is like Jesus fingering me while I eat birthday cake
im hiding in a corner. drunk. with a plate of stolen jello shots. im pretty sure people are looking for me or the jello shots.
I five year old is judging me because I just opened a bottle of Sam Adams with my teeth before 8am
Reunion weekend was a success. Had 3 ex's inside my vag. Hat trick!
So help my penis see only you. Give him some attention as well.
His penis could choke an elephant. A baby elephant... But an elephant non the less.
As yoda would say; A bitch, she is.
i don't know man... i just want to listen to John Lennon every time i finish fucking her. is this love?
I'm sorry I lead life with my vagina.
We need to get me chipped asap
I dunno. The drunker I get, the easier econ gets. I may be onto something here.
Randomize
