So the hot 23 year old i went home with last night is really 17 and was here for orientation.. i feel like a pedifile...
In that case, you should probably come up to the union, orientation is in full swing, your kind of guys ;)
cunt.
we've reached the level in our friendship where i don't think he would rape me
he poured tabasco sauce in my vag.. I'm still having a hard time going to the bathroom.
Ever since he's come out, my facebook stalking experience has gotten uncomfortable
let's get her a shirt that says "i went to key west for spring break and all i got was this illegitimate child."
You kept spitting the skittles out cause you said they tasted like "balls of sandpaper"
You yelled "sharpie war!" then jammed it in her ear
My professor just told me I'm living a lie and I found puke on my pants. How do you think it's going?
I just haven't been myself lately. I slept with a guy 21 years older than me and I've been wearing my hair in a center part.
God loves me. So high, craving Jimmy Johns chips, looked down, unopened bag in front of me. Still doesn't feel real
I ended up in a bathroom giving my hymen a pep talk
I just bought emergency deodorant at Dominick's and put it on in front of a homeless man while waiting for the bus. He laughed and said 'girl, you a mess'. This is my life.
He started making out with my boobs. I didn't know whether to be proud of my boobs or ashamed of my mouth.
I'm home now if you wanna come over.
Sloane just tried to lick my eyeball. I'm going to regain my composure then I'll be there.
Yeah just pls explain the dishes and the dildo. I don't want to lose my job over a dick in the cooler.
Randomize
