Should I ask him to prom mid fuck? That way he has to say yes.
I swear I am going to pee, wipe my vag with my hand, and then slap you in the face with it.
Stars make me really horny. Especially that shiny one its just staring at me.
Can you believe The 5th Element didn't get best fight scene in 1997?! I'm still bitter. 12 years later.
Haha how do you remember that?
HOW COULD I FORGET?!
I feel like I'm one of those people who someone looks at and thinks "how did she get into this college"
i just lost my virginity over my 3 hour lunch break..
u hav a 3 hour lunch break?!
i like how the length of my lunch break is the thing that phases u
..and then spiked the maple syrup at iHop
I feel like I had eight dicks in my mouth
I wasn't hungover this morning. My head just hurt because someone tried to suction cup a dildo to my forehead.
I woke up this morning covered in blood and peanut butter. I am now safe from vampires with nut allergies.
My meds have diminished my sex drive, this must be what regular women feel like
Then you started asking people on the drunk bus if they knew the word "gumption". if they didn't you told them they weren't taking advantage of their high education opportunities and you were disappointed in them.
Yes... I'll kill two birds with one crazy ecstacy filled night.
He has a British accent. He could read me the phone book and I would come so hard he would need a wizened old man in a rowboat to save him.
Just so you know. And I'm telling you this because I care deeply for you. Blue raspberry poptarts taste exactly the same as the regular raspberry ones.
Randomize
