I loved tuna sandwiches so much in grade school it was so embarrassing
Everyday all the kids would be like oh grosss whose eating tuunnaa
Well, she's an atheist who is addicted to the Sims.
Who isn't?
My history teacher just took his shirt off cuz the classroom was to hot. And then he invited us all to join him.
They have a pepper shaker for pot.
there is an extreme lack of margarita in my mouth.
How much did you drink?
Enough to be hungover and still think roller coasters were a good idea
Just wanted to say a big ole FUCK YOU for coming out to mom the day before I have to drive with her for 6 hours. Ass hat.
God gave me a talent besides one night stands. I feel like I should use it
SOME DUDE PUT OUT FOR A MCCHICKEN AND YET YOU STILL WON'T FUCK ME
I should have known when she said it would be "fun" we'd end up in the hospital
Getting a lap dance from a girl you went to high school with really isn't as awkward as you'd think
And she called me out by name, nothing could have made it more awkward but it ended up not being that bad
I really regret not asking “like a cupcake” when you asked me to eat your ass
I covered the puke with a shingle there's not many chunks. I think it will blend quickly.
Ps can u get with my cousin? He's a freshman at uconn and he's very attractive but like were related....
I remember waking up on the bathroom floor and seeing my teeth behind the toilet
Randomize
