I can't get into him, he looks really young. I'd feel like I was blowing the Gerber baby.
and she's shaped like a lego person so that's not happening
had to check his id this morning to remember his name.... i was wayy off
His mom took away his car and made him quit his job.
HE'S 26!!!
I like how the only thing you spelled correctly is "i'm tequila"
Apologies for hacking your facebook and posting that picture of you passed out hooked up to the IV...but we were sat with you on the ER floor for 3 hours, it got boring
Tomorrow morning i will black in to find a christmas tree in my room that i dont remember how i got. I love college
Wanna skype?
Can your lips gently and pleasantly suck on my balls via skype? If not, then no.
I'm eating crumbled blue cheese out of Tubbaware. My life is nothing.
The ONE weekend I don't put anything up my nose, and it decides to bleed like crazy
I may or may not have told him that he's "the only one with a PHD in this pussy"... I should like direct cheesy porno flicks or something.
Well at least I will forever be known as the girl he ate out on the lifeguard stand while people walked by. On the first date.
Wait, there's no way I said I would suck his dick. I know drunk Katie.
No, you told him to suck YOUR dick.
See now that sounds like drunk Katie.
I don't care how many things you caught on fire, it's still not as bad as doing coke and then filming yourself having sex.
I am a unicorn in a field of flowers, you asshole.
Randomize
