You're so easy to please, it's adorable. Like an alcoholic puppy.
i am already firmly committed to doing irish carbombs w/ 12 different people, and the st pattys day party doesnt start for another 24 hours. i may die
Just got the orientation leader spot. For the first two days, I will be one of the best looking guys on campus. The freshman girls will be so disappointed they settled for me when everyone else comes back.
I'm beginning to feel kind of at home at Police stations
would he be offended if i told him that "national coming out day" is october 11. thats subtle enough right?
Come outside. The vendor wants to go out strong tonight! Russian hooker interviews. Don't ask. We leave in 3 minutes.
A homeless man just asked me if I had seen any "nekkid chicks with heineken bottles run by"
Berkeley was the right choice
The only image of you you know is from reflections or pictures. Its 2d. But what other people see is 3d. How do you know that's your real face! MIND.BLOWN.
Then you better bring Starbucks and a box of condoms in the morning.
Oh shit. This is getting real.
Was considering going to moonshine but I think I'm just gonna stay home and drink beer because there is no law against partial nudity here.
I swear, the cow we tried to tip tried to eat me. and all I could think was, oh how the tables have turned. worst trip ever
To be fair I went my whole first week without showing up to work drunk!
I feel like my cat and I are playing mind games. I need more friends.
Tinder recommend to a friend: making threesomes easier since 2016
Good, I've got all this booze. It's intimidating to be in the room alone with it..
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