So, it's like build-a-bear for your vag?
Haha oh wow he'd be perfect. He's got everything MTV looks for in a real world cast member. Gay. Tool. From Methuen
She didn't talk for 45 minutes. We finally convinced her to open her mouth. There was a flower in there.
Yeah, well I just made $600 while taking a shut cause two diff clients called while I was in here. Tell me being a lawyer doesn't kick ass.
On my way to the DMV to get arrested
We need to tone down the drinking before our 7pm class. I don't remember receiving any of these handouts.
FYI, Sammie and I made the executive decision that we're getting a pet octopus and keeping it in the ballpit. Just thought you should know.
Someone came into our hotel room and took our remote
What should I do?
I just walked out topless, stared his brother straight in the eye, and ate all the rest of their cookie dough.
I'm eating lunchables with a glass of wine while I FaceTime the guy I lost my virginity to.
Someone somewhere has a picture of me vomiting in a bus stop trash can while a drag queen held my hair for me.
Pride claims another victim
Doing coke by yourself isn't as fun. Even when you're watching a James Franco movie.
Just walked past the field playing Jesus music with a fanny pack full of condoms and beer. Happy Sunday.
i looked that guy up on facebook. the one who went down on me for two hours
what's the verdict
i've been scrubbing my vag all morning
My penis is lonely
So is my ring finger
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