I'm walking down the halls of our hotel and listening for sex noises and knocking when I do.
And he tried to make it as casual as possible by asking where i was going on vacation while he was poundin me.
I'm going to listen to christmas music to trick my body into cooling off.
All I remember is holding on to the elevator asking it politely to stop spinning
Wait time out. Did I start last night with pants?
He looked at me and said "Last call" before putting his penis away into his boxers
I can't wait for the day Google doesn't remind me that I got arrested for having 3 shots called 'frog cum' lined up in front of me.
I like you as a friend, but I'm in love with your dick.
Blonde girl lying face-down, passed out next to my bed, walls are covered in guacamole. College is looking excellent.
Are we in any of the areas with tornados?
Dude, i don't even have pants on yet, it's too early to think about tornadoes.
I threw up in my brother's Easter basket
Hey when you get home, can you do me a solid and throw one of your pregnancy tests on my bed?
EPT or First Response?
My vagina measures dicks. It's accurate to the half inch.
Im bringing my light up rubber ducky just in case we end up at a rave tonight. HE CHANGES COLOR!
Step one: We finally agreed on an au pair that we both wanna fuck.
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