I have no idea who these bands are he's listening to. If his current playlist was a pandora station, however, it would be titled "music for closet cock gobblers"
HAH. HARRY POTTER CASUAL CONVO HAS BEEN EXTENDED TO DISCUSSING WEATHER. SO PRO
And my fence, why is part of it on the roof?
I didn't sleep with her. I'm boycotting arizona and she's from phoenix.
He made me a mix cd. There is obviously something wrong with him.
gpnpr hd vmdd nm the ggrl whm was mn my lar
I need you to use more vowels.
He was rocking just a diaper, shoes, and a gun. Sadly, I would still hit it.
In the world of sexual, erotic texting, you rank somewhere between "how much teeth do you want" and "how dry do you want it"
Just saw a couple do like 5 Sakai bombs and my dad goes "who says love is dead"
Dude there is a stripper at my door saying she has my birthday present. She knows my name...but it's not my birthday...
God works in mysterious ways my friend.
I'm not entirely sure that the guy that just texted me is not on drugs right now. I'm also not entirely sure that he isn't about to be incarcerated.
My dad's girlfriend is driving through the snow to bring me my purple haze. If he doesn't wife her up, we have a bigger issue on our hands.
Is this like a preordered booty call?
I'm glad you don't care about kids. That's one of your better qualities.
dude the water is back on, you can stop shitting under the tree . . .
Randomize