I puked in a mailbox on the way back from your house.
Yes, I am watching The Hills Have Thighs. And yes it is a porno remake of The Hills Have Eyes. And, again, yes, lesbian sex in the desert. Get the sand out.
He won't talk to me. He'll only communicate using scissors
Also pencil in smooth jazz and illegal activities. The usual.
We left at the same time. You got home three hours after I did and said you got your head stuck in a fence. I can't believe you don't remember this.
Do you think I could put your penis on reserve for tonight or tomorrow night?
I have an excuse to be a whore in Mexico. I'm conducting an experiment to see if small dicks are caused by the poor drinking water.
asked the cab driver where he learned Swahili last night.
It was a karaoke bar combined with a liquor store and had a donkey pen in the back.
Keeping it classy as usual I see
Omg I'm puking right now and then sneezed four times in a row. You don't know pain til this happens to you.
LET US USE OUR GENITALS TO CELEBRATE THIS VICTORY
Then that means he's outwardly conservative. Inwardly he's a total gay horndog. He's like a spy that can ruin conservative plans.
I want to change all my life goals to that.
I need to shower three times. First to be clean, second to wash off all sins, and third will classify as baptism.
I will show up on your front porch in a wet t shirt and some mac and cheese
i got my period today. mid walk of shame and im wearing a shirt that says stay classy. my life is a joke.
Randomize