And I just remember seeing him for the first time and being like, who is this ape of a man? Like legit he could be the missing link
She had just swallowed, of course i didnt kiss her goodbye
Wasn't she moving abroad?
Are you really going to debate this?
so for future reference,at what point did you feel like a line had been crossed?
he's got a countert top full of yard sale blenders so id say maragita wednesdays is a go.
Should I be curious about Jeffrey randomly sending me a picture of him holding a crab, or just move on with my life?
You do realize there's a subtle difference between not remembering your outfit from april 17th of last year vs forgetting that last night you undressed in the street and were grabbing every dick you could reach, right?
I can feel the fear and stress bubbling in my stomach. Or maybe that is the pregnancy.
I am not ready to suck todays dick. Todays dick just laughed and came on my face.
I think I need to donate blood to see if I have Hepatitis. Again.
ecstacy + fleshlight = not all that upset about being newly single anymore
We don't really communicate like that.
Communicate like what?
Communicate like people who want to see each other when their genitals are inside their pants.
At some point, you're going to have to talk to a tree and do what it says
No like I actually peed on the treadmill. As it was running
She's walking to the bar while holding a fifth of fireball, talking on the phone and puking like its nothing out of the ordinary
I guess I asked for the two old strippers numbers at the end of the bar and it turned out to be the bartenders mom and aunt...
Randomize
