S and I had anal without a condom because I'm on my rag but he didn't finish. Should I still take Plan B?
Almost peed between 2 cars...till I realized that it's daytime and I'm sober.
just found out I caught the bouquet at the wedding. I win for being the drunkest yet most functional bridesmaid.
It's like you're a magic genie of bad timing
He has a shower chair now. So he sits and watches me shower. It's kind of creepy.
Obviously last night's theme was "Let's Make Bad Life Choices"
I had my room mate call my phone after last night and it was in an uncooked quesadilla
hey at least you are getting hit on, i spent all day researching cat sedatives
Which president had the biggest dick?
Take your time, I'll wait
I now have a "weirdest thing a guy ever did in bed" story. Cut my fingernails.
Yeah I'm gonna need you to stop it right there.I know this is supposed to be a safe space but Imma have to exit.
I'm a stupid stupid woman who is totally going to rock this holiday season dick drunk on that Ginger
It was all good until his cat started licking my nipple along with him
He drove me to my therapist appointment because I was too drunk to drive. Total keeper.
I'm pretty sure my calc professer is on coke. He's just too excited for this to be an 8am class.
Yeah. Of all the things to be cock blocked by a plague is the most unexpected.
Randomize
