We are walking down to the lake and then i dont know. Where did you sleep?
Places.
Plural? Please tell.
I think I just puked all over my comforter and my roomdmate won't wakt up to washc it for me
My mom said "I don't want to fund your drug problem" so she gave me a gift card to the book store. I now have a 420 page book on growing weed.
I just woke up with a bunch of French fries in my hand and a chocolate shake balancing on my pillow. Lovely.
Rent Disney Oceans. Smoke a bowl. Fast forward to the seal section. Then call me.
I never want to hear the words 'my therapist says . . . ' while naked again.
I decided I was tough enough to wax my bikini area myself. Long story short, I'll be drunk when you get home
Just saw the guy I slept with last night in a bar. He gave me a high five and kept moving
So for St Paddys day I colored my junk green and got a little hat for him....wanna see it before I sober up....
You thought there were zombies attacking us so you tried to tuck and roll out of a moving vehicle. Also you should consider wearing underwear
fuck sobriety. I want to wake up tomorrow in a park or some shit.
Also Fuck you Stephen King and Fuck the horse you rode in on, making me cry In front of my coworkers.
Public service announcement: Just bc it is Margarita Monday does NOT mean your stomach will readily accept that much alcohol. There IS a reason it isn't called Magical Monday. On that note, better luck on Tequila Tuesday.
What are you bringing to class tomorrow?
sorrow
I feel like you should store your weed in something that suits your personality. For example mines in a hollowed out disney princess book.
Randomize