Theres a random in my bed. Omg but at least he's a law student?
So I'm at the Chevron by your house. I need a condom and a couch.
Together?
Preferably.
I am officially superior to you. I said "Go Go Gadget Dick" before I fucked her. I dare you to beat that.
Last nIght I drank wIth the new guy from fellowshIp & my pastor I've known sInce I was 7. It was agreed by them that I had nIce tIts. I'm not weIrded out In fact I'm flattered...
I think Charlie st. Cloud is the saddest thing I can masturbate to.
Held my professor's hair back while she was puking. I'd better get an A out of this or else the pics are going on Facebook.
she could've warned me his penis was curved
ya i dont think she expected you to get with her boyfriend.
So i forgot that my head is completely wrapped in gauze, and tried to do the "come hither" look. He think's i'm brain damaged
am i so blindsided by his great personality that i'm hooking up with an ugly guy?
i thought you knew
I tried to bribe him with road head and his toothbrush.
Romney sounds like a middle school girl and that creepy ass smile makes me want to close my blinds
I know, I know. But we've discussed my friends and appropriate social behaviour, and I'm pretty sure topless karaoke was a no-no.
I'm not saying you did or didn't sleep with him but he's has your thong hanging from his ceiling fan
We hooked up with 2 friends last night as always and she stole their fucking cocaine and I just had to drive to their house and make her give it back to him hahshshahahah only me
I woke up with what appeared to be LSD in my pocket. Know anything about this?
Randomize
