Jesus was obviously not given an itemized list of your sins before he died for them
I should be nowhere even remotely near facebook in this condition.
I dislocated my rib eating pizza. I think I am broken.
Bathtub drinking tim. I have no pool so I work with what I have
It was like a Thanksgiving meal, which you spend 8 hours cooking, and the family wolfs down in 20 minutes. All that flirting and build-up for like 90 seconds of pumping and he was gone in a flash, never to be heard from again.
He rubbed aloe on my sunburn while I blew him... could he be anymore perfect?
I saw your dick pic and thought there goes the last thread of my heterosexuality.
I finally broke my dry spell. I did it. D-do-da-Dora.
Trying not to ruin Mother's Day with the enormous hickey on my neck. Nice.
All I'm saying is this is the exact reason I should not be left unsupervised.
Can I pee and smoke my bong at the same time or is that like eating on the toilet
So my step mom just informed me she tells stories about me at work as a form of birth control for the girls that work there, not sure if i should be offended or proud.
Dude I cant right now. Were talking about pickles.
I threw a lamp at you?
Yes, yes you did.
Awesome
dude im trying to eat his ass so can you stop for 10 minutes
Randomize
