did you make any bad decisions?
many, i pretty much fell in love with a freshman...it doesn't get much better than that
I'm at a work party and I don't know how to drink socially. You know, like slow?
her dad's the mattress king, she's genetically engineered to be good in bed
nothing says platonic group sex like a campfire and smores
On the quad today: An amish choir singing something weird, and not 30 feet away 3 girls tanning topless. Definition of diversity.
Semi hypothetical question. Do you think its physically possible to bruise your clit?
I like your house better though. Cause it has febreeze and lube.
I don't think you have any idea how kinky that sounds.
Did you leave a blizzard on my porch last night? Or was that someone else giving out a metaphorical threat to me?
"I wasn't planning on buying a chicken, but I bought it anyway." --some guy on the bus with a chicken
"Yeah, I only have nine toes." --that same guy
Yea we just broke up
so do we start sexting now or later?
I'm pretty sure he's playing the harmonica in my shower right now. I just really need to pee.
I told him it was fine and then I keyed his car.
totally just bought a bottle of gin with nothing but change
don't ever let anyone tell you that youre not 100% class
You don't understand. This boy has the Mona Lisa of cocks.
On a scale of 1 to 10, with 1 being “good” and 10 being “banging a student’s father”, how bad is it that I’m banging a student’s father?
Randomize
