we both passed out while playing beer pong, woke up in the morning and continued to play coffee pong to cure our hangovers
had to check his id this morning to remember his name.... i was wayy off
You ruined his night from a different state? Impressive.
It's totally ok to sleep with him. The only place I have feelings for him is in my vagina.
I am pretty sure they consider me one of the "bros". They compliment girl's racks to me and are the human forms of dick-be-gone. They won't sleep with me more than once cause it's "weird", or let any "untrustworthy boys" sleep with me and I still help them get laid. Not...fair...
I almost just texted "I'm lonely" to my gynecologist.
There no better feeling of self control than stopping yourself before telling your girlfriend she gives head just like her sister.
I'm just gonna start letting dudes eat it. American idol for my vagina
My manager said you offered to make out with him to ensure I keep my job if I didn't show up to work today
I'm about to have a threesome at the hotel where I had my quinceañera. Becoming a woman under this roof for the second time, whaaat
Well I'm a full service fuck buddy so lemme know if I can get you food or water or anything
He fed me Girl Scout cookies while I was still tied up...what did I do right?
I wore my lizzie mcguire socks to the bar last night. Because that's how i get all the ladiez
"Plot twist... I'm straight."
No one can touch me, I'm made of fruit.
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