**** and his GF asked me to give his stuff back, and they would give me a 100. HA, they dont know I have it to charity haha
I looked at my own cervix.
going to class early so i have time to go on the moonbounce. this is why i go to art school.
I mixed the ketchup wit the mustard in one bottle to save time making hotdogs
girls just need to accept the fact that i'm going to make out with their boyfriends
Something smells like weed and I think it might be my mascara. Come sniff my eyes
He was standing in the front door with a kareoke machine yelling at the neighbors as the unloaded their van
Horrible. I told her my girlfriend is in the hospital and she tried to give me a lapdance.
Will you just get over yourself and come over here and give me that dick...then you can go back home and continue to cry over us breaking up. Thank you
A guy is going to be inside me and I'm gunna start singing "I am stuck on your penis, cause your penis is stuck in meeee!"
I can't even masturbate anymore!! That was my last source of cardio!!
I don't remember much and some girl almost convinced me to jump off the bridge while she held my stuff...
it is basically gonna be an ugly Christmas sweater rave
Tell me how you feel about belly buttons
I've never been so excited to have my ass in so much pain.
Randomize
