Yeah I'm pretty much like lane on gilmore girls except my mom doesn't look so mean all the time.
i don't even remember going to get food. i think i got gas too.
Last night I dipped into my beer fund to pay for groceries. SINCE WHEN ARE MY PRIORITIES SO WHACK???
the ball fondling will be left out of the trip recanting
I think I broke a hole in her wall trying to do backflips
putting weed in the twinkies box was possibly the best idea you've ever had
Hey do you think you can sew an adult onsie with easy access if you know what I mean!!?? It must have bunny feet.
I was laying there trying to sleep and then he sat up, took out his dick, and put it on my shoulder. It wasn't even hard- it was just casually perched.
Omg no. We ate a raw pumpkin last nighr. We dipped it in BBQ sauce.
The night got interesting when the random guy next to us handed us a bottle of champagne and the rest of his ciroc bottle. When we asked why he did it, he proceeded to point at his friend who face planted the floor.
I got my eyebrow ring humped out. How is that even possible?
My greatest achievement in life thus far is being the go to friend when you have questions about butt plugs.
It's all fun and games until you rupture a testicle
All my friends are getting married and I'm pole dancing in a tattoo shop. I don't know how I feel about this.
They spent thousands on one day. You made $76 in 30 minutes. You should feel great about that.
I sure hope so...I wonder if he could tell in that email that I'm really good at blow jobs. Hopefully he heard that tone. Any means necessary.
Randomize