I'm gonna have a badass scar
Dude i fell asleep inside of her
thats awesome
rainy day on campus = new personal fetish for girls in booty shorts and colorful rain boots
he wrote Vegans should suck on cow dick on her wall with permanent marker. thats how he got the black eye
Just woke up. Need to shower and fuck. Be there when I'm done disappointing. Should be 30.
All i know if I'm throwing uo into a bag with a smiley facE on it right now and this is not a smileuy face time right nowe
I guess I was trying to make a cheese sandwich, I had to change my sheets cuz I slept on it and the cheese melted all over me, Dave, and my bed
I'm having one of my monday morning walk of shame coffees if you care to join.
Oh my god. I'm not ready to be an adult. I'm not ready.
I though us hooking up in the field was your way of saying you were an outdoors person
I just call them the hipster frat because they wear shirts other than pastel polos and listen to MGMT while playing dice.
Had to walk of shame past Westminster Abbey this morning. Pretty sure a Japanese tourist took a photo of me.
Is it too soon for me to wonder what sex with him would be like?
You're always so late and I'm always so drunk.
I have hobbies that aren't destroying myself and others...i can make hats.....
Randomize
