I just figured it out. Meghan has the same smile as Sylvester Stallone.
The first song on his sex mix was "highway to the danger zone"
I think I might stay on campus instead of going home for thanksgiving and see how many townies I can hook up with and no one will be around to judge
Margaritas are 250 calories. Now measuring all food in margaritas
i DID try to find you last night. i asked where you were and you texted me the letter "e" and a picture of the dark.
THEY WONT LEYT ME IN AND I REALLY NEED SOME FRUIT
I reek of latex and grilled onions.
Mission accomplished.
i woke up in just my socks. my clothes were outside, he had rugburn on his elbows, and a window was broken.
I need to have sex. It's becoming like a matter of public safety.
I'm suffering a hangover from deep within. I feel like the half of the parts of my body are permanently laced with alcoholic substances
...and that's why girls with IBS don't paint their nails
My name will be tattooed on his ass by sunday.
I climbed up on the tank of the toilet so I could take a slo-mo vid of myself pissing into the garbage can, but the base of the toilet shattered and I had to bail.
I mean you're asking high Chelsea. I'd sell myself for a rice crispy
Considering we almost incited a riot on behalf of LGBT rights I have to say that was the best time for our moral compass to turn south.
Randomize
