Annihilated within 20 minutes of arriving on Saturday, proceeded to hook up with him half a dozen times/almost have sex in the shed. Later on I text his boyfriend letting him know he's okay and that he's asleep next to me. If I could parlay this skill into a vital component of national security I'd be the Jack Bauer of homewrecking. Diner later?
Just try to make good decisions...remember our convo we had about morals the other day?
Turn them off?
Some great men died of syphilis. I accept your compliment.
Well, a cop just pulled up. This could go either way.
Sophomore year, I fucked on your desk chair. I'm sorry. I love you.
I told myself this year would be different, I wouldn't get "pee in a fish tank drunk".. Got to the girls house... Fish tank in her room.. 2 years in a row.. had to keep the tradition going
idk. I was on the deck with Dominic and i felt something weird on my arm. I looked down and you were licking my elbow.
Its not that hard, just find a girl reading 50 shades of grey and point her my way
At the drs she looked at my back saw your scratch marks and asked "does your back itch a lot?"
We fucked on shrooms. It's like his dick was a beam of light and when I came I turned into a prism and my orgasms were made of rainbows.
Spent fifteen minutes in the car thinking i was psychic before i realized the cd was not on shuffle
I'd say it's his fault for never running us through proper protocol for "catching your RA in the middle of him banging some girl"
Please don't tell me that blonde guys name is Matthew I won't be able to fuck a guy with my brothers name
every time someone would wish me happy birthday I would be like "thanks happy birthday to you too"
I like your optimism Chelsea but I'm not about getting my salad tossed
Randomize