awww and there was just a proposal on stage with the pussycat dolls !!!!!
Did someone propose they get off the stage?
we're microwaving frozen margaritas its not the same without u
"Party in the USA" was played at church youth group last night. It was like everything I enjoy hating was aligning against me.
I'm sweating while I eat mac and cheese. That fat.
Today was my first day of hebrew and I learned how to say give me sex... I think I can quit now
we had incredible sex, then he proposed with the vibrating cock ring
I put the extra pregnancy test in my sex toys box as a reminder that my actions have consequences.
My nephew just told me I smell like apathy and regret. Thats the hangover I'm dealing with
I mean looking back on it, it's unlucky but at least now we can say we were in jail from 2011 to 2012
That's thinking positively..
I cant believe im wasting my plan b experience on this guy. I should have saved it for someone special.
Vague recollection of me ripping your shirt off at the bar... I hope I asked first, otherwise that's real rude.
After last night I think its official. Deep down, we like alcohol more than we like women.
Sorry for throwing up in your humidifier last night, I thought it was some sort of electrical garbage can
I puked on her cat, I think I should at least buy her breakfast
"suitors" is just a nice way of her saying "the guys i'm fucking"
Randomize
