my vagina is like the nba. its where amazing happens.
this is amzing! feels like my body is having sex with its surroundings!
quick I need to know all the foods that the very hungry caterpillar ate
Just saw Youth in Revolt. There are only so many times Michael Cera can lose his virginity.
Home, forcing the cats to make out. Someone should get some.
Im sleeping in your bed. Sorry for the sand and the noise and the loud people. Im starving
Your blankets are not drunk friendly
It's like leaving me for his wife wasn't enough. He had to give me an STD too.
Did you guys seriously let me trade my id for a kebab last night??
told our landlord the hole in the wall was from your head during drunk sex..
how did he take it?
not as well as i would have thought
I feel that shower jager is exactly what this man needs after last night.
You're a disgrace to gay men everywhere.
Can't keep a straight face around her after she asked me to "make fuck to her."
Uhm after 8 I don't recall anything. All I know is there's a picture of me playing pong with my grandmother.
I spent the day drinking wine and meditating. I'm zen as fuck.
WHO ARE THESE GUYS WHY AN ORGRY ON A MONDAY LMAO
I had a dream last night that I answered the phone and after I said hello, Shia Lebeouf started yelling "DO IT! JUST DO IT!" That's when I knew, I had officially become meme trash.
Randomize
