Wearing these hooker shoes was a mistake
try this...when you orgasm scream his address including city state and zip...
all the douches that like ed hardy are the same douches that were obsessed with lisa frank
Thanks for the birthday present, i had so much fun playing with it
Are you talking about my vagina?
I was hitting on her while she was puking ... yeah i was pretty drunk
I know i'm the slutty cousin, but be honest. have you ever got your nose ring caught on a guy's zipper?
I hope I bought a crossbow. Also I need to not drink that much
I tried to make friends with the geese living behind Hughes. They didn't really like that idea.
Are you high?
Just to be clear, the only reason you're allowed to scream "COCKTAIL SERVANT" at bartenders is because you have nice tits
There's a guy in a life size dick costume, and two guys with white shirts that are each half if a pair of breasts in a red bra lol. They came separate but when they saw each other there was some titty fucking in the street, it's only 11
I drunkenly texted ur dad last night telling him he raised great kids hahahahaha
Sundays were made for eating Ramen pantless in bed.
Drunk you wants to be petty, not you you.
maybe i should limp back to therapy...
oh yeah will you also bring home vodka i wanna do shots on the roof
I FOUND A VIBRATOR IN MY BABY BROTHERS ROOM. IM FREAKIN OUT MAN ITS BIGGER THEN MINE
put it back and chill out ok
NO FUCK HES 15 WHO EVEN SOLD HIM THAT HES A BABY
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