stop calling my apartment porn island.
is asking a girl out on a date while in another girls bed in poor taste?
walking in back of a girl wearing booty shorts, a halter and a bracelet that says trainwreck. I don't get it. The first day of nice weather and all the whores come out, are they like hibernating bears or something?
Couple in the hotel room next to me keep fucking. When I hear her get close I call the room wait for them to stop and hang up. If I'm not getting any tonight then no one should.
I have the slightest memory of swinging a bag full of condoms over my head...
She finally pulled over after almost hitting 4 cars and a semi and asked me if i was rwady i told her to let my penis to come back out
I just burped smoke on the bus. Hello 6:48am
I just watched in amazement as you had a full conversation about water temperature and bacteria with your pet goldfish.
Either of you know why the shower was on and the bathroom door wide open with no one in there at 6 in the morning?
friends are allowed to bang on New Years, I read it on the Internet somewhere.
Apparently I have decided there are no repercussions for my actions
Christ I forgot how flexible you need to be for a decent sext pic. Jesus.
It's just a friend who is recently single and I'm going to heal his broken heart with my vagina
I never thought I would encounter a situation that was "Too Gay" for me...and yet there I was.
He saw my Halloween/ Costume closet and assumed I’m into cosplay. I’m going with it. What’s sexier, a cop or a nurse?
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