Apparently when you order 'bottomless fries' at red robin that doesnt mean you can go around to every table and eat all the fries you want off other peoples plates.
i got excepted to unl lol
You mean "accepted".
I've never seen so many strippers at a funeral...
ttyl tear gas
We haven't even scratched the surface on the damage we could do. Just saying
ALso, saw an adorable man walking an adorable dog with his adorable kid.
And yes, that last sentence is biased because my ovaries started screaming
My day in three words: secret purse cake
I just took three of the most beautiful hits of my life. As elegant and smooth and delicate and graceful as figure skating
You've created a tinder dominating monster.
EX BOYFRIEND'S TWINS WERE BORN TODAY. THIS CALLS FOR A MARG.
I JUST SENT A TOILET SELFIE TO THE WRONG PERSON.
I feel like I may be the only person who can say they crutched their walk of shame. past the secret service.
she chased shots of jack with a fucking steak. i'm in love.
I need to get some goddam control over my hormones
Do you not realize that being Batman fulfills about 95% of my non-sexual fantasies?
Randomize
