I just woke up to a guy kissing me goodbye and leaving for class. I don't know where I am, don't have any clothes on, my underwear are gone, and the shoes I found with my dress aren't mine. He just walked in and gave me my phone. I was on my period. Come get me I will walk to the nearest intersection and wait.
Grossest hangover story of 09: Puked in the bathtub. I was in it.
Is it bad to use cherry nyquil as substitute for grenadine? Because i just went there.
Nah, totally cool. It already has the alcohol in it.
I want someone to please me without me having to show him steps 1 through 5
I wasn't expecting a boner of this magnitude
He upper decked the toilet, got himself lit on fire 6 times and lit 4 other people on fire in the course of 3 days.
btw im using a cooler as a purse cause i love string cheese
at one point he couldn't find his underwear so he put on my catsuit to go to the bathroom
Hey, I'm renting a storage locker for the summer to keep all my bondage shit in so my parents don't see it. You wanna split on it for your all your weed shit?
You just managed to turn Doctor Seuss into a sext. I really like you now.
I made a booty call at 3:30 am on a Monday... I think I just became the ultimate female fuckboy. I don't know whether to be ashamed or get myself a trophy.
When I came out of the bathroom you were naked dead asleep on the couch but your dick was still rock hard standing straight up. I almost took a pic. It was impressive.
I need a job that does not involve working with people who wear animal costumes when they get fucked.
Ill try not let guys feel my boobs for free drinks next time, no promises tho. I am my boyfriends worst nightmare.
You spilled your drink, and we laughed so hard my boobs popped out of my shirt.
Randomize