...., I just tried brushing my hair wothh a toothbrushg. fail
ps not my toothbrush awkward.
You know, Peter Parker would not have been nearly as cool if he had gotten bitten by an ant.
words cant express how excited I am to make January 1st our own personal version of The Hangover
My mom asked me if I was being satisfied, sexually. And then discussed positioning.
The hot Japanese girl in my class just said her "favorite sexy American actor is Nick Cage." That, I can work with.
Should we discuss the rug burns on my back or just save that for a separate conversation
She said we should all be mermaids since didn't breathe for 9 months inside our mothers. I want her logic.
And the funny thing is when I went to the kitchen this morning, all 4 pizzas were still there in their boxes, untouched. My question to you is: what were we eating last night?
Well for starters the people who just made my burger at the grab and go just told me to "hang in there"
Whatever you didn't send me pics of you topless making bacon
that's right. bitches got laser pointers. let's fuck shit up
I didn't notice because vodka
I would pay to watch a Bravo special of you getting Botox.
She's going to be the first to die of too much illness. Not even super bad stuff like cancer but like for having a cold at the same time as a sore throat and chlamydia or something. Just too much diseases.
where are you?
two trains and a bus walk of shame. so not worth it.
Randomize
