mom just said that her bf is good in bed. fml.
i am watching a movie about a vagina with teeth and then you sent that to me while im eating sushi.
so her cute freckles turned out to be blackheads
So he said if we had sex he'd take me to Build A Bear. My virginity is so worth a trip to build a bear.
You're 20.
IT'S BUILD A BEAR!
I didnt shave my beard last night, so I could feel it while Im shrooming today
Homecoming wouldn't be the same without all the drunk old people puking on the street.
my mom and grandma just had a splits competition. slut runs in the family
while we were making out your friend starting kissing my toes and all you had to say was "just go with it"
It's 4th of July all over again, we were chasing with the pool water.
I have to take his virginity. It's what God put me on earth for. It's my life mission.
Let me clarify that those tears were for losing my fuck buddy and his penis, not to the fact that he decided he wanted an actual relationship with feelings.
Dude imagine how many pictures of dicks Obama gets. That can't be unusual. Almost every kids in the US has written the president a letter.
Thought about you all night last night, then I fucked the shit out of my boyfriend. Win win for me.
DAMMIT Im supposed to be running a company not discussing dick piercings!
He's like all my past boyfriends wrapped up into one fuck up. It's enjoyable to watch.
Nana added me on facebook...i think i'll have to call her and warn her about my lifestyle before i confirm her as a friend.
Randomize