the more pounds shes got the more points. bonus points awarded for specialty moves used. aka broken cowboy, tobogan, dutch oven, or brazilian fake out.
Things on my life to do list: hold a pound of marijuana. Check.
is there any particular reason you took a shit in a zip lock bag and left it in my refrigerator?
I want to fuck you on the side of the bed tonight.
babe, don't say it like that!
I'm sorry, I want to penetrate you on the edge of our sleeping quarters this evening.
Been home for 3 days and already spiked coffee with Kahlua. Only 106 till we go back to school
Im also drinking whiskey while on a treadmill wearing high heels so let's consider that for a moment.
I woke up with no pants, someone elses shirt, but my new years crown still on. That is dedication.
Before we fucked we both mutually agreed not to tweet about it.
We're not on Beacon Street anymore so now your argument about not peeing on the sidewalk holds no water. Whereas my bladder has holded every water.
What kind of present accurately says to my male suitemate "I'm sorry that I accidentally flashed you my vagina while I was super drunk"?
My vagina has a mind if its own. Can you imagine if I didnt have you to run her ideas through.
He gave me my financial savings if I invested with him while I was giving him a bj.
I love how u said nothing about the sidewalk sex but refused shower sex
Totally reading about penis envy for my final exam
You’ll (maybe) appreciate that I picked at my ingrown hair again. Quarantine updates are getting BLEAK.
Randomize
