hey can i ask you a kinda weird question?
i know what the question is. yes they are bigger, and no i did not get plastic surgery
so after he got his stomach pumped, he asked for a smoking room.
she asked if she could keep her bee antennas on during her mugshot. i love halloween.
Hmm. I hear gunshots, car horns blaring, hear drunk white people screaming, and see about fifty status updates pertaining to the hawks. I guess they won.
the threesome consisted of him fingering dana while i laid next to them watching how i met your mother.
I cant believe she fell for the mistletoe belt AGAIN.
Only you would get a date out of getting hit by a car
Just had a tv talk show interview in my mirror. Got into to some pretty heavy shit man, would have made good viewing.
My new hangover cure is going for a haircut, just so the stylists give me a scalp massage during the shampoo.
That certainly explains the nine times your hair has looked different just this last month alone.
In between rounds of sex, you stopped and did drunken handstand push-ups.
Allow me to explain. Triple D is a surprise. It's like if you're expecting to fight one person, then you get ambushed by more. Except it's a good ambush, because it's boobs, not death.
We banged in my car doggy style with my head out the window. The sky was marvelous and I saw a shooting star. Its destiny; we're meant to fuck forever.
He referred to our sex as "an Olympic event." My tits are bruised.
Normal people find beers in their gym bag, right?
i mean ive seen your left buttcheek how much more bro can this get
Randomize
