i know ur right I'm sorry I'm stupid and incompitent look I can't even spell incompetent right! Fuck!
I'm making progress with her.. She actually looked at me today and gave me a dirty look. Things are going real good.
i think a pirate just stole the rest of our fucking beer. what an appropriate costume.
What hospital were we in last night? Insurance needs to know
Its a bummer that corporate america doesn't believe in $2 u call its on a Sunday night
I loved your drunken rendition of "I wanna dance with somebody" that you left on my voicemail last night.
He had me saved in his phone as "Dick Socket". Lets see if I ever fuck him in a bathroom again.
More or less binge drinking as a giant grape seemed justified
Congratulations, you have helped solved the mysterious disapperance of Dani's phone which was found in the munchies cabinet next to the oreos. Your reward is star power as well as a fat ass bowl of Nebula. You may proceed through the wardrobe and into Narnia for your prize.
the remote is under the fat chick passed out on the couch. Good luck .. and may god have mercy on your soul.
may or may not have figured out a way to make my mom a drug mule to bring me ecstasy...
It started with a wedding, followed by a drag show, and ended with Trevor getting punched in the face by the bouncer. How was your weekend?
If we tried baptizing you I feel the water would start boiling around you.
On the plus side, I know I'm allergic to latex now. Like really fucking allergic
He agreed to matching Christmas pajamas today, no guy does that for a girl he’s not seriously considering marrying.
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