dude i need help, im throwing up blood.
no youre not, you just drank a pitcher of red koolaid trying to sober up.
oh, so thats why my junks red.
wow. cant help you there...
you proceeded to suck on ur pinkie saying it reminded you of chris and you wanted him badly
You know you hit rock bottom when you make out with a guy named after a cereal.
5th glass of wine. There's pictures of Jesus everywhere. It's like you're constantly reminded of your sins here.
I doubt were getting our security deposit back... the toilet just fell off the wall
He's only a freshman and he needs to expirence shit like that..
YOU would be the Freshman Expirence
I mean, we do coke and have sex occasionally...I wouldn't call that a relationship.
All I want is tacobeell and your body
that's my favorite sentence you've ever said.
It's like the bermuda triangle of cat puke
We were tripping too hard to figure out to tell him where we were so we sent a picture of me laying outside the tent saying "find us"
My logic for bringing him home was, he's in law school so odds are he wouldn't kill me.
Wanna play whack-a-mole in my pants?
Your word choices worry me.
She actually made an event on facebook for tomorrow when she does a pregnancy test, 8 people are attenting so far
Hypothetically speaking of course, is it bad if a cat eats lube?
But I think I successfully seduced her with my alias.
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