google image searching george stephanopoulos at 1 AM on a saturday night...once again
Just getting around to doing laundry. Jesus there's a lot of blood on my birthday dress.
The last thing I remember is you asking me how to grow french fries.
we just got kicked out of the mexican restaurant. i have a full pitcher of margarita's hiding under my coat.
She gave him a lap dance on the glass table. You can guess how that ended
Good. I hope they all got E.Coli from snorting coke off of some homeless prick's asshole.
My dog just threw up a condom. Sorry for accusing you of not wearing one, I found it now.
This summer has already been like the best summer ever. FREEDOM IS AWESOME. GOD BLESS AMERICA AND GOD BLESS THE SINGLE LIFE.
At this point all my Tinder matches are telling me I'll be fucking the whole male population of UMass '17.
I should not be this drunk in a place where a girl is wearing a princess dress
I woke up and sent him a text that said 'I'm sorry forever'
So how does one go about leaving their family vacation to hang out with someone they met on tinder
I got a lap dance last night from a girl while I was wearing a Captian America onsie. My life does not suck.
Hopefully he gets to dig deep into my body, before he digs deep into my past ..
i still cant feel my toes or walk straight...its been 2 days.
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