i hope not, i just know that at one point I was sitting on the bathroom floor eating bugles and crying because i had no one to show that it looked like I had witch nails when i stuck them on the ends of all ofmy fingers.
she screamed "my eye!" and it brought me a surge of bad memories. except she was yelling about a lemon.
I pretty much just threw a bunch of clothes and my vodka in a bag..idk where I'm gonna end up tonight but I'm prepared.
Tonight will bring shame to my future grandchildren.
you can't tell me you didn't shit your pants I saw them in the trash can by the bathroom.
And then he said he would build me a mountain dew water fountain
Marry him now.
I apologize for being mean. I love the blender and your vagina.
Multi-day drunkenness is to binge drinking as black diamonds are to skiing. They're tough and confusing and you hurt afterwards, but you did it and you probably got an alright story along the way.
Well puke fest 2014 just happened
There is a midget in cheetah face paint on a leash here
I came on her face and asked if she wanted fries with that. Currently driving to McDonald's.
We were making eye contact while i was throwing up.
WAIT this kid is eating yogurt with a fucking ladle. what is happening?
dude I fucking saw you snort tequila
Want to help me interview candidates to replace my Cub/Boy Toy when he leaves for grad school next month?
Randomize
