dats a huuuuuge bitch!
who is this????
so i have my big date this weekend, and i was practicing giving head with a bottle in the shower. i stopped and looked at the botton of the bottle. it was PURE MOLD! if i die, dont tell the doctors how this happened....
Just saw two girls doing a walk of shame together. Slut bonding at it's best.
I want you to come here and listen to her climax and then tell me how funny you think it is.
Remember when we saw my neighbor taking dick pics of himself? He's back at it!
I plan on having so much gay sex in our house while you gone.
We bought a pool from walmart at 2am...and to make matters even more white trash we headed to Applebee's for half off appetizers and corona-ritas
Good. Need a drinking partner later. FOR AMERICA!!!
I'm just trying my hardest not to get addicted to drugs or pregnant and all your other friends are out there getting married
You put me in such a good mood with that road head, I bought everyone at Hooters donuts.
He's a doctor now.. hope he can cure his small dick
I'd marry him just to keep his penis in the country
I just gargled with NyQuil
To celebrate the holidays this evening, I will be replying “FUCK YOU” to all my spam emails. Can’t tell you how excited I am
I turned on Elf, made myself a mojito, and am eating one of a sleeve of Ritz. You tell me if I wanna go out tonight.
Randomize
