ok, I understand that your bathroom door is broken, but at least close the blinds next time you take a shit. The entire parking garage just watched you.
I fukin lobve the states. Girls here let me fuck them because they like my accent. I may not go back
omg. don't know how to spell his name, but hot new zealand guy's dick is magic
No subtext here. People are naked.
I wouldn't accept the money so he folded the $20 bill into an origami puppy and left a note saying "Not blowjob money"
I don't even know why im sitting in this office eating a poptart.
Was that not clear on Friday when I nearly deapthroated two ice cubes?
it was like a shit fog rolling out of the east to encompass me and have it's way with me
do i respond to the booty call for the guy with the bigger dick or the one who has the gourmet coffee i like so much? at this point i'm leading toward the coffee
I mean with a sentence like that I knew I would be cumming
I got high and had sex with reindeer antlers on. It was magical and animalistic. Tia the season.
I'll just give him your contact info, and you'll somehow manage to get laid. Which will make me feel like your vagina's agent or something.
I dunno. The drunker I get, the easier econ gets. I may be onto something here.
I thought one was bad but really there are two woman stupid enough to marry our brother...unreal
Girl just left one of the apts upstairs carrying a giant bottle of kahlula and a lunchable.... I feel like we could be friends
Randomize
