at some point to night u and I have a 'meeting' too...(1-737): I hope so
She always manages to outslut me. I can't keep up
Next test. Underwater blowjob. If you fail...out of water blow job
When's a good time to tell your boyfriend you've slept with his ex girlfriend?
Sorry about giving you those ripped gym shorts after my dog ate your pants, but after the awkard BJ incident I didn't plan on hearing from you again
Teflon bitches. Nothing fucking sticks to this kid, not even a kid. Maury Povitched this shit outta that situation.
I just rode a horse than walked onto my property in boarshorts, flip flops, and holding a 40. What do I win?
I knew it was going to be a good night when my mom said "Have fun, be safe...wait, do you need any weed for tonight?"
On her way to bed she said, "If you have sex on the couch, just move my blanket" Needles to say, we moved the blanket
nobody was home so I boiled the dildo
No one should ever be so high that they forget the food. That's just...its a violation of God and Nature, of the very laws that we live by!
Your vagina felt like having sex with thanksgiving mashed potatoes. The best kind of mashed potatoes
I just fucked her in the corner of an ally while holding a large pizza waiting on a pledge for a ride.
I mean, if I asked you, would you cum on cotton candy for me?
Three cans of beer can fit in the shower catty... multi tasking
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