Halloween 2010: the NuvaRing girls. You're Thursday. We'll walk into the party chanting "Monday, Tuesday, Wednesday, Thursday, Friday, Saturday, Sunday, Everydaaay".
I just went to a chocolate syrup wrestling party I think you need to get on my level
And for your info. Don't pee outside with glow sticks. People will still see you.
gpnpr hd vmdd nm the ggrl whm was mn my lar
I need you to use more vowels.
Some rando is vomiting profusely into the garden outside the employee entrance. Where are you when things like this happen to me?
Vomiting outside the employee entrance
This is final. The chair stays in the bathroom, we are too old to be puking from the floor, grown ups sit in chairs infront of the toilet to puke.
Or grown ups don't drink themselves into vomiting.
Change of plans I'm coming home and shotgunning all the beer we have.
My vagina and my morals are playing tug of war
Bro. Some kids just drive-by judged the shit outta me.
I hope after we constantly bang for 2 days straight we can agree to be friends again
You need a twittervention. You're better than this.
Moonshine marathon is never a good idea
You tried to lick the lightbulb and fell off of the chair onto my wife and gave her a concussion. Did i mention you were naked?
Don't worry about it too much, but I just committed us to possibly raising a kid
Put on your bikini and meet me at the pool \nit’s cock o’clock!
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