im never drinking mad dog again and i have your belt.
He disabled his match.com account in front of me
This morning when you woke up you looked like one of the Wii Bowling people. I think it was the eyebrows combined with the sambuca
judging by the pasta sauce and dirty pans i spent my blackout being emeril
I just saw someone EAT a flashcard out of frustration. Finals suck.
You sir are most definitely in. Better get your penis an umbrella as that bad boy is gonna get soakkkkkkeddddd.
and if my full six pack comes in by Halloween there is no stopping the man slut costume. I have no shame
I wrote my name on his balls in sharpie. In the homosexual world that's like a diamond ring. Shits permanent.
my boss just offered me his leftover salvia im not sure if it was a trick question
Due to your tardiness, I'm saving you my tab
i'm pretty sure i can feel a baby kicking just looking at him. if he didnt impregnate you, you officially have an iron-clad uterus.
He is married, and has a regrettably large penis. I need to find another one right away to get myself out of this mess.
How big does a penis have to be before it becomes regrettably so?
AMAZON SELLS SEX SWINGS!
the orange of my hangover Tang is hurting my eyes... my coworkers knew it was hangover Tang too.
Thank you for stopping me from getting a butt tattoo. That was a good call.
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