weak ass sauce last night. waste of time. you suck. ps. your boobs are fake
Just saw a man in a wheel chair using his feet to push himself backwards through a crosswalk... good morning Atlanta
im walking the streets of bville with a bag of cat food..looking for my car. i dont ever want to turn 21 again.
just jacked off with my ROTC uniform on. boy i feel like an american.
you only had a canadian ten, but you said it was all good cuz you would just by molson.
When you're opening a bottle of tequila with a golf club, it's probably time to stop drinking...
Oh I woke up in my neighbors garage using one of their sleeping bags, as my neighbor was doing laundry in there.
Hundreds of bug bites..Dad jokingly says "looks like you passed out naked in the woods somewhere"
Taking a shit on the side of the road is not how I imagined this morning would start.
Honestly I'm not even that excited to see my boyfriend. I'm more excited to see his penis. His penis inside of me.
This morning I found four opened yet full beers on my desk and my towel rack pulled off the wall and in bed with me
Still drunk on my morning "run" which has turned into a walk. Just burped fireball
This is even better than the wine from my laundry basket
Did you come home, throw out a ton of shoes, then leave again?
That is exactly what I did.
What do you mean relationship? He paid for my tires and I gave him a blow job.
Randomize
