I do have sympathy for you. It's just not going to manifest as a blow job.
well let's see. after you forcefully shoved a half-eaten apple in my mouth, you ruined the pepsi by dumping an entire beer in there.
Think they will judge us if our pre drink is a kiddie pool of jello shots?
he was like the dessert in the all you can eat man buffet that has become my life.
Hypothetical question: how bad would bacardi be as an IV drip?
death...100% death...what r u planning.
i woke up hungover wearing my gym shorts and the condom from last night. Wine bar thursdays rule.
Its raining shots and i keep catching them in my mouth like you with dicks shits crazy
Lube filled water balloons always make for a good time
I accidentally sent him a snapchat of my boobs and now we're going on a date tomorrow... Could be worse.
Just spent 10 minutes washing away my own puke. This gas station lady loves me.
Positive reinforcement! I'm training him for being a good boy and coming over. He gets sex and cookies.
I'm so drunk. Remember me this way.
It looks like you got dick slapped by the sandman..
I got titty fucked last night and you're breastfeeding your newborn. Clearly we have gone two totally different paths since 2011.
I hate when my Bumble matches make it hard for me to stalk them.
Randomize
