Afterall, it is the real San Francisco treat
well that was a long night...
dude, you were pretty messed up... what happened?
no idea... but i still woke up with my pirate hat on
Do NOT cum in me, on me, or in my bed.
You told him your wedding ring was part of your costume. not okay!!
How much would it be to rent out Gus Johnson so he can announce our flip cup games?
im not 100% but im pretty sure at some point i was rubbing ur bf's beard telling him how magnificient i thought it was
And I'm ok with his balls touching my ass
no you're not allowed back
come on. everbeers was a great idea. you fucks had a great night
I don't know which is worse, the fact that he can say will you fuck me in so many languages or that I'm turned on because of that
It's gonna be ok. As we grow older we sometimes lose sight of what's important to us. Like safe sex. And standards.
I have not brushed my hair. I'm wearing a yoga hoodie. I look like I slept in a gutter somewhere. Today is going to be a good day.
Honestly I volunteered because the email made it sound like it was a once in a lifetime opportunity to be a sexual spy kid.
Bring me your tired, your weary, your buffalo chicken dip
this potential sugar daddy just sent me a photo of him butt naked in the woods saying he wants to "grow our spirits together." so i think i found us a new drug dealer!
I woke up on the green space outside our dorm cradling a watermelon and sucking my thumb. College is crazy man.
Randomize
