their songs make me feel all the things I wanna feel. Ya dig?
and what kinds of feelings would these be?
Happy, horny, occasionally hungry
Have you ever noticed every guy named Shaant has scene hair and date girls with racoons stripes in theirs
His name should be shouldn't
It was so romantic--he turned me around to face the sunset during doggy-style over the couch back.
My doc was like ur only supposed to have 6 sexual partners..thats just one semester at college
Hands down the most disgusting picture message ever received. Thank you.
im here for your entertainment
until he told me my vag was like a juicy apple and he loved eating it, yes, i really did think we were both sober.
making a list of all the places we've peed. separate list of places we peed when we were stoned
So the bump is from hitting my head in an elevator. Apparently I dived into a cab head first too.....
Apparently I made a stripper cry last night when I paid her $10 to go away
I swear to god, if you fuck the hot one you're paying me back for the shot I just bought her
I really couldn't care less what she looks like. That's why The Lord Our God gave us doggy-style.
Any recommendations for how to tell your wife about the pics of her 19 yr old sister on a porn site without admitting you were surfing said porn site?
just move with us, we wanted to get a dog. youre kind of the same thing..
I just want you to know you're the worst sister ever.
If this is about me and your ex, it's not my fault she doesn't like men.
I honestly think sometimes all you need is a $2 alcoholic punch poured from a jug into a big glass to feel better. I guess abblebees is my new problematic fav
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