yeah I know. she is a stupid fat trailer trash bitchwhore and I hate her
but when she came up to me in the bar I had to be all like "OMG HEYYY how are you, I haven't seen you in foreverrrrr!!"
but for the record, yeah, I hope she gets mauled by a bear and dies
Dude im not sure whos apartment i woke up in but i just showered here and their shampoo in phenomenal
She knew it was going down when I had her search for "condoms" in my iPhone Maps.
9 am. shotgunning while conditioning my hair. i love college football season.
you told grandpa to call you daddy
So I just told the bartender I would go down on her. You need to get here
I'm going to tattoo a maze on my back for the next fucker that tries to blow early ....
Shits getting dirty between us in her dad's bedroom. I'm talking early millennium rap and r&b
My tits, and hanging out behind a hotel eating pizza.
We were fucking while the tv was on, and one of those animal cruelty commercials came on. We then switched over and started doing it doggy style. It was then that I realized that I'm going to hell.
OMG BTW REMEMBER HOW HE ORDERED PIZZA THAT ONE TIME WE HOOKED UP. APPARENTLY HE WAS HANDING IT OUT TO PEOPLE WHO LIVE IN MY BUILDING AS HE WAS LEAVING
So much easier to puke and rally now that my gluten's under control
we are the apple cider girls!
I have bits of ceiling fan all over now
He's watching Always Sunny and eating refried beans straight from the can.
I’m making a jello mold of my penis
Will it be as disappointing as your actual penis?
Randomize
