He had some BAD nuttage
Nuttage?
It's like cleavage......... but different
Five things that make you perfect. Go.
The skin of a dead hooker. The blood of the innocent. The soul of a kitten. The hat from cat in the hat. And sunglasses.
we need to go to the store. i'm tired of having bud light for breakfast.
do you want me to pick up budweiser instead?
drunk making out is the fucking beeeest. specially when it's your exboyfriend
I wonder if you'll be as excited about this as you are now tomorrow morning.
I could feel myself puking on my feet but it was so warm i didnt even care.
It was a rude awakening when I turned on my phone and the first thing I saw was a picture of David's dick with a face on it, I need to stop drinking in his basement...
I'm challenging a 70 yr old alcoholic woman who is half my size tonight. Wish me luck
I kept trying to give you water and you kept spitting it back at me. You looked like a camel. People were staring
No. If you are gonna end this, you are gonna do it right. Not by getting bombed and falling on a strange penis. That was the old you.
You may genuinely find a use for the siphon. But the bag of human hair is less likely.
We were messing around at his place it was going fine until he said, "I'm going to cum, hand me the shot glass"
Copy that. Decided to shower with a beer in a glass bottle. Gotta stop the bleeding first. Be there is 20
I'm glad our friendship can withstand laughing mid-blowjob during the diarrhea scene in Dumb & Dumber.
Also, why does our bed smell like mayonnaise?
Feel free to drag me back to reality at your convenience
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